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Friday, September 19, 2008
HamsterDame's Roast - Part 1
On this inauspicious occasion we gather to pay homage to our guest of honor HamsterDame. She runs this little web site that has become quite notorious for handing out spankings, but for some reason many of us keep coming back to read her never ending updates.
Silly Hamsters is the name of the site, and the name says it all. Like stalkers, we look into her window hoping to catch her with her pants down so we can post the pictures on YouTube. Our voyeuristic nature keeps us returning to the scene of the crime. Either that or the smell of the room tells us it's time to give HamsterDame more pellets, freshen her water and clean out her cage. If it weren't for us she would probably never remove her eyes from the Big Brother feeds and forget to eat altogether.
In a way we are keeping her alive and well, like psychopaths with our victim locked in the basement, we lower the bucket and say to her "it puts the lotion on it's skin, or else it gets the hose again!"
So we pay homage to our kidnapped host. All the while more and more stalkers darken her door. She is about as charismatic as a train wreck and attracts the biggest of monsters.
Even the weather seems to send it's worst nightmares in her direction. Through the years she has been paid visits by the likes of benignly named terrors Alicia, Bonnie, Allison, Chantal, Jerry, Dean, Allison (again), Grace, Humberto, Rita and now Ike. She seems to be a magnet for disaster. Each time she just flips them the bird and goes right on typing. Perhaps that is why we watch her travails through the internets. One never knows when the next storm of conflict will rise up and cause her grief.
Other names have appeared throughout the years. Coleen with one "L", diff, Dixie, footballmom, gray, Grog, Claypo, SuZieQ, xtex88, Sleepyeye10, DRATS, alua53, Betty, CanFan, BenF, verity and a whole slew of other visitors who so badly need get lives that Death himself wouldn't waste his time with them. It is my extreme misfortune that tonight I have that task.
But since I am easily persuaded (usually a six-pack of import beer will do the trick), I have been commissioned to put on this soiree. If you have not been mentioned, it's because you didn't care enough to give me your input or I didn't care enough to use it!
I realize some of you wouldn't know funny if it crawled up your pants leg and nibbled your bum. So just in case you think I am talking about you... I probably am.
Appropriate cliche is an oxymoron in my opinion, so let me use another one, let's get this show on the road!
Before we do, let me remind you all that this is a roast. If you were not aware of what a roast is all about then you are about to get an education and quite possibly a rude awakening. Those who didn't know what they were getting themselves into should understand that this is all in jest and meant to be humorous in the darkest sense of the word.
Let the games begin!
Our first guest tonight is our great and gracious friend diff. She tries to say that a lot of us are better writers than she is, but we all know she can be witty as a wombat. Even though she is often accused of having a few in her belfry! Everyone give a warm welcome to the wonderfully wacky Silly Hamsters wunderkind, diff and her poetic stylings!
HD,
My literary ability pales to that of Drats, BenF, Gray, Sleepyeye10, Dixie, Gregor, Grog and many, many others, but it comes from the heart HD...
There once was a woman in Texas,
Probably not drivin' round in a Lexus
Reality's her game,
HD is her name
Her site is the bomb,
She's like everyone's mom
We all come to play,
Not an ass? you can stay
Her hand slappin's a bitch,
She'll drag your words through a ditch
Beware of your tongue,
Or you'll be wishing you hadn't swung
As you're reading and trying to eat,
Her wit can knock you right off your seat
Quality's we adore,
As you spew your coffee all over the floor
Producers make her mad,
Manipulation makes her sad
BenF makes her smile big,
While Drats has her doing a jig
Will is her baby,
While Dan is a maybe
Eddie was her Duke,
While Maggie made her wanna puke!
Ivette made her glad she's a hetero,
James Z's big 'thang' made her say, 'rut-row'
Evel made her crazy,
And she wished Keesha wasn't lazy
Nakomis' voice grated on her last nerve,
Marcellas' 'boo-boo', threw her a curve
Holly King made her feeds a dread,
And she called Jase a 'poopyhead'!
Thought Kaysar was 'dumb',
And Cappy a chum...................p
Cheesy comps make her wish she was blind,
But thought Sarah was oh so kind
Could go on and on with this,
Instead I blow you all a kiss
HD's knowledge of the game,
Rivals all sites of the same
We love her enough,
And know that she's tough
To take all our crap,
But she's nobody's sap
Love ya HD,
Peace, Health and Happiness,
diff
Our next guest star is more of the strong, silent type. He is a man of few words, but when he does wander out from his fortified bunker to speak, his words pack a powerful punch!
Say hello to the boards favorite stalker, alau53!
HamsterDame has been blogging big brother so long isn't it about time she changes her bio to be a forty something female instead of a thirty something female..don't they say forty is the new thirty?
alau53
Our next guest may only type with one finger, but that one finger is more powerful than Rick James pimp hand. She is an infamous musician, along the same vane as William Hung and she has written a wonderful ditty for HD and some of her favorite hamsters from this season. Now everyone don your ear plugs as you give it up for Betty and her rambunctious remake of I'm a Little Tea Pot.
I'M A LITTLE HAMSTER
sing to the tune of I'm a Little Teapot
verse 1 dedicated to Keesha "I'd go on allstars if they invited me." (I'll watch you if you do.)
I'm a little hamster
Don't wanna pout
Put me up and vote me out.
CHORUS
I have a friend in Texas ...Hamster Dame,
She tells the world about my shame.
My housemates didn't keep me,
And that's okay.
I may live to play another day.
verse 2 dedicated to Michelle "I do look good on camera." (That's a matter of opinion.)
I'm a little hamster
Tall and coarse
Wind me up and hear me curse.
CHORUS
verse 3 dedicated to April "I left the house with my dignity intact." (We'll see you in Hustler.)
I'm a little hamster
Long and thin
Turn on youtube and watch me sin.
CHORUS
verse 4 dedicated to Ollie "April, will you be my first girlfriend?" (WTF OMG ROTFLMAO)
I'm a little hamster
Don't drink or smoke
Just your typical horny bloke.
CHORUS
verse 5 dedicated to Jerry "stupid of me to fall in the pool" (Trusting Memphis is even dumber.)
I'm a little hamster
old and gray
I wave the flag all thru the day.
(all together now) CHORUS
Thanks so much, HD, for all your hard work. Hope to read your blog on BB 11.
Betty
Cantankerous may be the best way to describe our next guest. She hails from the land of cotton and she has been known to have a thing for arrogant bastards. She is an aspiring talk show host and reportedly the actual reason that soldiers used to sing O, I wish I was in Dixie! Hooray! Hooray!
Everyone please give a warm round of applause and a rebel yell for my friend (and DRATS' secret admirer) Dixie!
Top 10 Ways you know you've been blogging too long with Hamster Dame...
#10 - You sneak away to your computer after your significant other goes to sleep
#9 - ...You end your sentences with.....three or more periods.....
#8 - You start experiencing "withdrawals" after waiting so long for HD to put your post up
#7 - You buy a cell phone specially equipped for blogging
#6 - Your purchase vanity license plates with "BB" and your screen name on it
#5 - You sit on-line all night waiting for Drats to post
#4 - Benf starts getting the hots for you
#3 - Gray thinks you're old, feeble and stupid
#2 - Drats posts something about YOU
and the #1 way you know you've been blogging too long with HD....
#1 - You make the call back to join the HG's next season
Dixie
Thanks for that Dixie, although I think David Letterman's job is still safe... I kid, I kid.
Now our next participant has gotten a special pass from the Betty Ford clinic so she could be with us tonight. I seems that she is so alone even Mr. Sandman won't pay her a visit. Of course she's always got us to keep her from feeling too lonely. The bags under her eyes are SO BIG,(HOW BIG ARE THEY!) they're so big that when she checks out at the grocery store the sacker NEVER asks "paper or plastic ma'am?" (GROAN)
Okay, Okay. With no further ado, let's have a rousing welcome for Sleepyeye!
(Sleepyeye grips the podium.)
Ahh-khummm, HD you are...
*raises voice to cover noise from knocking knees*
HD you are an enabler. I am sure I speak for more than just myself when I state that I have failed to kick the BB habit, in fact it has gotten worse. I've tried 12 step programs to no avail, and to be perfectly frank, it's thanks to Silly Hamsters. I innocently tripped across your site in 2006 -- lurked about -- and then bam! You reeled me in, as you have done with so many others. I changed my moniker a few times in hopes that others would not know how effective your trap was. Finally decided to call a spade a spade -- and admitted to being sleepy-eyed from season to season -- All thanks to you.
Last year you led us all to drink on more than one occasion. Poor Toots really got hammered once, to the point where Gregor had to call a Taxi for Pete's Sake. We ordered out, and drank some more, all while you reigned over the Silly Hamster Kingdom.
Each year I notice how nice you look in your Ref outfit. Last season you ruled over many a bout of all star wrestling between Gray and... Well pretty much any other poster. You participate in smack downs to those that take you on, and you always come out the winner.
This year you have led us to be environmentally conscious by leading the fight against the Plastics. You have helped us understand that what goes on under the sheets -- does not always stay there; nice doesn't equal win; houseguests actually have many names; and that CBS/BB really knows how to edit. You've gathered many a character to your Silly Kingdom that help offer sage information for all to read and ponder, all the while keeping the peace throughout the land.
Some of the head court jesters are DRATS, Diff, BenF, Gregor, Gray, Grog, a couple of col(l)eens, SuZieQ, Dixie (of many names), and so many more. Without you this place would be chaos. With that I leave you with this little ditty:
Since we've found HD's Silly Site
We now have greater insight
Because Silly Hamsters has great might
We've lost our daily life to this plight.
*sleepyeye shuffles off to snooze until next season*
Who knew Canadians had television? I thought those in the Great White North saw nothing but snow and primarily used televisions as extra storage boxes for their beer. But apparently this one actually figured out what a satellite dish is for and sees Big Brother regularly as well as an awe inspiring ability to use a computer, something even our aspiring POTUS hasn't yet figured out. Because Sarah Palin can see her country from Alaska, let's ignore the fact that she ain't from around here and welcome CanFan to the party!
Having been a Big Brother TV fan for five seasons, in the sixth Season I was amazed and delighted to find a group of individuals online who shared the same passion (what can I say - I was a slow learner). Of course, their leader was a mediocre blogger who was elevated to cult status by her obsession with Big Brother and by our obsession with her.
What can you say about someone who abandons her family and friends to take up with a group of hapless voyeurs for three-month stretches of time? You can say she's crazy, that's what you can say. So, Crazydame, I hope you know that this roast was all in good fun. We would never write these things about you if we didn't love you ... at least not where you could read them.
CanFan
From HD - Y'all are crazy and fantastic! Gregor, thank you for all of the hard work that you put into doing this. I appreciate it more than you'll ever know. Everybody, this is just the first part. The second and third parts are coming up over the next couple of days. I hope all of you laugh as much as I did when I was reading all of this. :)
Posted by HamsterDame at September 19, 2008 04:30 AM
Comments
HD - sitting on "pins & needles" waiting to see what the big boys have written! Good job all, especially you our little sweet'ums... Gregor!
Posted by: Dixie "Cup" at September 19, 2008 05:05 AM
Hold on a minute! Okay, I'm back! Had to go change the "Attends" adult diaper! Last one was a wee wet!
Gregor, when you speak it's like magic! Poignant & dark all at the same time!
Alau53, what a quick eye! I have been looking at that 30 something since 2005, and it never dawned on me, I'm the only one ageing here! Funny!
Betty, I'm teaching that one to my kids!
Dixie, I have each and everyone of those symptoms!
Sleepyeye10, get yourself plenty of lost sleep, as you'll need it to top that post next season!
CanFan, as always, too funny!
Can't wait to see the heavy hitters!
Posted by: diff at September 19, 2008 07:24 AM
I just started reading 1984 by George Orwell - where the whole concept of Big Brother came from. I think the producers should read the book to refresh their memories and loosely base the next season on the book. Bare essentials, women aren't allowed to wear makeup, only alcohol allowed is gin, everyone has to wear overalls, etc etc. Now that would be some MUST SEE TV!
Posted by: *Stephie* at September 19, 2008 08:28 AM
Hope I'm loved so much by so many!
Posted by: SuZieQ at September 19, 2008 09:07 AM
Gregor: Fantastic job - the host with the best roast - UR#1!!! But, William Hung? LOL at myself.
sleepyeye: Love your ditty. Such a funny post and I'll see ya after your hibernation. Sweet dreams!
diff: As always, You are really entertaining.
CanFan: HD a cult leader??? If that's true we'd better hope she doesn't have a secret store of cynanide hidden away. LOL
alau53: HD isn't old until she hears that old song "lordy, lordy someones forty" sung to her daughter. You're right about time catching up with her. TEE HEE HEE ...You are not alone, HD.
Dixie: Numbers 8 & 1 apply to me so I guess I'm not as far gone as I thought I was. Thank God I don't have to call a shrink. But is there life after Big Brother?
Joy in WI: Been worrying about you and hope you're doing okay.
Grog: Are you following docter's orders and taking good care of yourself? You know laughing too hard can burst your stitches. You are in my thoughts.
Lastly, for those who don't know the tune of "I'm a Little Teapot" it goes like this.
la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
Betty
P.S. Finally learned how to use spellcheck. LOL
Posted by: Betty at September 19, 2008 09:11 AM
The SS HD ROAST has been launched!
Wonderful work Mr. Master of Ceremonies Gregor! Don't think for a second that I haven't already copied that intro quote onto my list of favorite quotes (Yes I keep silly little lists -- but i don't alphabetize them by author, first words or into categories APRIL!).
Bravo, Diff (the rhymes were funny and adorable), alau53, Betty, Dixie, sleepyeye & CanFan; rhyming couplets, a knee slapper, a song, a top 10 list, a presented speech/ditty combo (was there a powerpoint presentation with that sleepy? :)), and finished off with a heartfelt testimonial.
HD it really is all just a bunch of wicked fun and twisted respect for you. And since it sounds like you've already seen the whole kit-n-kaboodle and laughed hard, that puts a smile on my face. Can't wait to see the next two parts.
An entire six-pack Gregor? I'd heard it only took until half way through the second can. :)
Posted by: BenF at September 19, 2008 11:02 AM
ROFLMMFAO!!! I cannot express in words how wonderful you all are, this roast has made a very bad morning into a wonderful afternoon of memories and emotions, I love you all and miss posting my insane thoughts on BB and getting spanked by the dame herself!, I was scolded several times for laughing so hard! This site is my lifesaver and I'm gonna suck everything I can out of it!!! Bravo, bravo, bravaaaaaa!!! I cannot wait till parts 2 and 3, you all are the best!!! Hoping this post finds my fellow bloggers in good spirits, Grog~
Posted by: Grog at September 19, 2008 01:07 PM
Love it! HD, I love your site so much!
Thanks Gregor for doing this, and thanks to the other talented posters for their wonderful tribute to our fearless leader!
Posted by: recelee at September 19, 2008 02:28 PM
BenF- Cans? You better be bringing bottled beer if you want these pants to party!
I must admit the beginning quote was provided by none other than Mr. DRATS of course. It seemed to fit right up there so well that I stole it from him... I am sure he doesn't mind since he "borrowed" it from the author. ;) But don't thank either of us, thank Mr. Lynes.
Posted by: Gregor at September 19, 2008 03:27 PM
OMG doesn't describe how fantastic and creative this was.
HD...love the quote from Lynes, will remember that for the rest of my life:).
Diff...what a delightful poem and so accurate, great job and great reading.
alua53...Very, very funny. I was wondering myself if she is still a thirty something:).
Betty...how cute was the little tea pot tune. I was cracking up as I was singing it, loved it.
Dixie...who would have thunk it, the top 10 list. How ingenious, great and funny.
sleepyeye10...she does always come out the winner:). She literally taught me to suck it up or get lost lol lol:). Great piece sleeyeye. I thought it was sleeyeye10? Congrats to all and to the host who's intro and intro of everyone was as amusing as everyone's roast. Looking forward to the rest of the roasts. I hope I gave a sitting ovation to everyone. If not forgive me and if I didn't when I re-read the roast I will. You guys deserve it.
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 04:53 PM
CanFan...after reading everyone's comments I noticed I did miss your's. Amusing stuff. I was just glad to find that there was someone else (HD) besides myself, that abandons their family every summer like I do, lol, lol! Great job CanFan.
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 05:08 PM
Ooops! Sorry Gregor, I gave thanks to HD for the quote. Nevertheless, same sentiment to you. And by the way I want to thank you for a fantastic job too. I will miss all of you when this is done and can't wait to meet back with all of you next summer or maybe sooner. For some reason I don't know one person that watches the show like I watch the show. So this is so cool meeting with a bunch of BB addicts. Wonder why we are BB addicts? I wonder this all the time:).
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 05:15 PM
Gregor - Fantastic Job!!! You deserve a case of bottled beer (that is what we are known for in WI.) Your intros are such fun, although I confess - had to get wheelbarrow to help haul those bags under my eyes! LMAO!
So glad this has brought a smile or two to you HD, since you bring so many to us.
Diff - LOL - you are so good at that kind of thing!
alau53 - I've wondered that myself...hmmmm?
Betty - so creative - take a little tea pot bow!
Dixie - 8,9,2, and 1 apply here!
CanFan - fun tribute and see the American's and Canadians really do have fun together!
BenF - Why, yes,it did come with Powerpoint. Didn't the 4,864 slides set at 52 seconds each, come through for you? I even had a laser pointer. Shucks!
Grog - good to hear from you - remember laughter is the best medicine!
Looking forward to parts 2 and 3!!!!
Posted by: Sleepyeye10 at September 19, 2008 05:17 PM
One more thing. Please forgive my spelling, punctuation and grammar today. Baking a cake and getting ready to leave so in a hurry. Sorry if I offended anyones, just kidding, anyone:).
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 05:21 PM
Thanks everyone for the accolades, this was a lot of fun putting together and I am happy to hear you are all enjoying it. Some of the best stuff is yet to come, although I thought this was a great start.
What I can't wait to see is HamsterDame's reply to all of this! I already know what is coming except for that part, and I swear if you don't laugh at parts two and three you don't have a funny bone in your body.
Go easy on us HD... remember we all love you this much!
Posted by: Gregor at September 19, 2008 05:28 PM
Gregor said:"Cantankerous may be the best way to describe our next guest." Why Gregor, I take issue with that remark... down here in the south we just call that "havin' a burr under yor saddle"... Come'on down here to south Texas... I'll show you cantankerous you little coyote.. oops.. I forget myself... (Dixie clears throat and gives a little wink)... I'll fix ya some pie hun... and bring that little Beelzebub (Beelzebul-rev std edition) DRATS with ya. I am kinda sweet on that litte smoothe talkin' Angel of the bottomless pit. ;p
Posted by: Dixie at September 19, 2008 06:09 PM
Why Dixie... I'm your huckleberry. That's just my game.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx1TWk-V4P0
You tell 'em I'm coming! And DRATS's coming with me!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynKoZD-sFi4
Will you meet us at the train station darlin?
Posted by: Gregor at September 19, 2008 06:49 PM
My goodness gracious dawlin'! I bet you two boys run 'round the house with red bandanas shoutin' "Go Renegades!"...
Shore I'll meet the train hun. Wouldn't want you two boys runnin loose like that down here... might git ya'lls selfs in some real trouble... ;)
(Dixie blows two little kisses to the two bad boys of the Hamster Hut)... though we all know there 'r others here... don't we girls...
Posted by: Dixie at September 19, 2008 07:12 PM
Gregor, you have something up every sleeve and all your pockets are crammed full of video links. If I ever go on WW2B A Millionaire I am using either you or Drats as my pop culture lifeline.
Posted by: BenF at September 19, 2008 07:15 PM
I loved it! I loved it so much I had to contribute - albeit late, I hope it is appreciated. I think I was pretty mean, but I was really inspired by the recent roasts of Bob Saget and William Shatner. I can't wait to see the treatment Gregor gives the next parts.
Thanks to everyone who has had me in their thoughts and prayers. You know how Mama Cass died from eating a sandwich - hello... Same thing here, only I didn't choke. If you want to know the details, click this link and check out my latest blog entry. http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog&friendID=31817548
I'm amazed at how many people are similar to me in that they are living with a lot of physical or emotional pain and reach out to others online. So think about that when my portion of the roast comes up. (I wonder if the people who do the big Friar's Club roasts feel guilty when they do this.)
Posted by: Joy in WI at September 19, 2008 07:16 PM
Good Evening Knights of the Oblong Bar Stool and Ladies of the Discarded Chastity Belt,
It would seem Sir Gregor's exercise in transient traducement is an efficacious success!
Well done good knight. Proceed directly to the throne of her Royal Hamster Highness, and prepare for your well deserved flogging.
(Gregor, I'll keep my claws crossed for you in hopes that she wears the sequined "Wonder Woman" outfit. Nothing quite like being tied up with that magic lasso and forced to tell the truth.)
Diff,
Well done dear. We haven't seen a limerick that long since Tommie Lee got blitzed last St. Paddy's Day, and was made an honourary leprechaun.
Alau53,
Good point. But inquiring as to the age of a lady? Tsk-tsk...
I couldn't be prouder!
Betty,
Your teapot tirade brings back fond memories of being kicked out of the Hades Preschool Academy as a little devil-ing.
Ah, I remember it well... The teacher (Ms. Lylith was quite the looker back in those days) asked at snack time if I wanted regular or chocolate milk. The DRATS-ter of course, reached for the buttons of her blouse and said,
"No thanks, I'd prefer to drink from the tap!"
CanFan,
Delightfully defamatory!
SleepyEye,
Spoken like a truly lady. How sweet of you to provide me an excuse for my Big Brother After Dark alcoholic binges. (That reminds me. I need to call Direct TV and cancel my Showtime subscription til next season.
And then of course there's the Dixie Cup.
Dixie,
You do me too much honour dear. Were my face not already crimson I might even have blushed. All night huh, just waiting for little ole DRATS?
Really, seek help.
Well, see everyone tomorrow for Hammy Roast, Part II (The Second Cumming).
Toodles,
DRATS
From HD - Don't cancel your Showtime! Watch one of the greatest shows on television ever - DEXTER! :)
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 19, 2008 07:23 PM
HD - Dexter's one of my favs too.. but do you really think we should encourage DRATS in that direction! LOL ;)
From HD - Perhaps you're right. That could be mighty dangerous! hahaha
Posted by: Dixie at September 19, 2008 07:50 PM
Dixie-cup,
Beelzebub? Really, I've never much liked that name.
Angel of light - My personal favourite.
The tempter - Only on days that end in "y" .
The Evil One - Clearly.
Prince of Darkness - Prince my ass. I'm the King baby!
Satan - Ok maybe, but it's been done to death.
The Devil - Capital T.
Belial - Wicked Cool.
Apollyon & Abaddon - Destroyer? Damn skippy.
The Great Dragon - Abso-flogg'n-lutely.
That Ancient Serpent - Not exactly how it went down. Eve lied.
Prince of the Power of the Air - A P51 Mustang, w/ Rolls-Royce Merlin Engine.
Roaring Lion - Mufassa, Oooooh, say it again!
The Adversary - He gives as good as He gets though.
The Father of Lies - Could be.
The God of this age - And gaining "red states" every day.
The Oppressor of the Saints - Of course, I'm a Packer fan.
The Sower of Discord - B.S. , I have a lovely singing voice.
Lucifer, The Morning Star - You be the judge. Does any other shine so brightly?
But Beelzebub, Lord of the Flies? I think not.
Get it right,
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 19, 2008 08:15 PM
I personally don't get Dexter. I have tried but no comprendo. But will keep Showtime because of the Tudors. One of the best television series on TV:). Drats...as usual lmao!
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 08:35 PM
OMG Dexter, Weeds, L Word, BBAD, Tracey Ullmann - I couldn't live without Showtime!
And you can see the 1st episode of Season 3 of Dexter online - just go to Sho.com and sign up to be a Dexter VIP and they send you the link and password.
Have a fab weekend all my friends! :)
Posted by: *Stephie* at September 19, 2008 08:44 PM
BenF, use me as a life line if you like... I might not even have to use "teh googels" to give you your $50K answer. Just remember, I charge twenty percent.
DRATS who are you kidding, you are a lot more like Beetlejuice than the King of Babylon. So why not grab a bunch of grapes from the hanging garden there and hop on that train Doc. We got a trip to make down south. I hear tell the wimmen down that way really know how to welcome a man.
Posted by: Gregor at September 19, 2008 08:47 PM
HD, Dixie, 'n Xtex88,
I have seen Dextor, and I've give you that the premise is brilliant, but (at least in the few episodes I've seen) it lacks the comedic relief a series that dark needs.
I dunno. Perhaps I may give it another shot this season. (I was after all, only joking about canceling my subscription).
But The Tudors?
Sorry Xtex88, I just can't take that program seriously. It treats history like a convenience store.
While it follows the life of Henry VIII loosely, unfortunately it's so loosely that I find it difficult to recognize the talent of the actors. Perhaps I'm just so disappointed with the inconsistencies, that I can't enjoy it as I otherwise might.
Besides, I consider Henry VIII to be one of my greatest accomplishments of that time period, so it's kinda a slap in the face. ;)
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 19, 2008 08:52 PM
Gregor,
No, no, no... We discussed this. This time you're Doc. I'm Wyatt. I got stuck with the Big-nosed gal last time and it's only fair.
Damnit Greg. If you've gone and bought the wrong flippen Halloween costume again this year, we're gonna make you do the Charlie Brown white sheet scissors maneuver. (Wait a sec. Maybe not. We don't wanna get Tavia started up on that thing again.)
Besides, after the recent smashing little "Choo-choo" incident here in California, I don't think I'll be seeing the conductor anytime soon.
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 19, 2008 09:03 PM
xtex88 - To respond to your inquiry - Sleepy, (ok for pals - you're one), sleepyeye was one of my first names out here, but had a couple of others before that too. Then last season sleepyeye9, this year sleepyeye10 and strongly suspect sleepyeye11 with the next season. As long as people don't call me by profuse profanity, I'm good with it.
DRATS - glad I was able to provide the excuse!
HD - I agree on Dexter!
Posted by: Sleepyeye10 at September 19, 2008 09:09 PM
Drats....I do agree with you. At times it is hard to watch the historical faux pas, but love it nevertheless. Not a great fan of King Henry VIII, jackass, but I am infatuated with Anne Boleyn and Queen Elizabeth I. Can't wait until they get to the Elizabethan era. Anxiously awaiting roast part 2.
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 09:30 PM
Sleepyeye10, OH duh! Thanks pal:).
Posted by: xtex88 at September 19, 2008 10:45 PM
DRATS SAID: "I have seen Dextor, and I've give you that the premise is brilliant, but (at least in the few episodes I've seen) it lacks the comedic relief a series that dark needs."
Hummmmmmm???? Dear oh Dear...! It's like inviting two girlfriends to lunch and finding out they don't like eachother! Dexter and DRATS, my two Dark Knights... what shall I do?
Gregor & DRATS... do not trouble yourselves over who gets to be whom this time. Just make sure you wear those red bandanas Dawlins... that's all.. ;)
Posted by: Dixie at September 20, 2008 04:58 AM
ps... DRATS... I rather like Beelzebub...
Posted by: Dixie at September 20, 2008 05:00 AM
HD - Dexter's is good on showtime on demand you can watch seasons 1,2 and catch up on the show a lot better than reg. TV cuts out a lot. I think Drats is crazy with out watching Dexter lol.
Gregor and everyone you all did a good job I lmao so hard. I cannot write like that.
Posted by: Susan at September 20, 2008 07:05 AM
HD - Did you see Soup last night? Had a funny part with BB10!
Posted by: Sleepyeye10 at September 20, 2008 07:46 AM
DRATS, "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds." Keep it up, my good man! I do love Dexter tho'.
Posted by: SuZieQ at September 20, 2008 08:32 AM
Found some old footage of Dixie and xtex88 here...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3JeJtc-HW4&feature=email
They are so cute.
Posted by: Gregor at September 20, 2008 10:54 AM
SuZieQ,
Thank you for the sentiment.
No doubt, we're all entitled to our differing tastes. However in this case, methinks perhaps it's more a function of Dixie Cup's premeditated propensity for the concoction of oceanic lunar influence. (Not that I, of all people, would ever find fault with such art.)
Know what I mean?
Nothing wrong with Dexter. As I said before, I would just prefer (in any film or series dealing with such dark subject matter) that there be a bit of humour to balance it out. Granted it's a very difficult cocktail to mix, but it has been done before.
In "American Psyco," Christian Bale's character provided just enough subtle jocosity to keep the viewer's head above the morbidity waterline, much in the same vein as Thomas Harris crafted the Dr. Lecter in the Hannibal novels.
Be that as it may, to each their own.
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 20, 2008 11:18 AM
HD just got a generator running and yes im now hooked where do i go to your site, thanks so much for making me smile today, i really needed the laughs i love all you guys on here and i will be back next year. big hug to all those affected by ike. gail
Posted by: meemee at September 20, 2008 12:36 PM
Gregor...OMG,OMG,OMG, that is beyond hysterical. I thought I got rid of that video years ago:). Dixie sure is a good singer, huh! lol, lol. If you only knew my history with pina coladas you would be laughing your ass of right now like I am. Can’t wait to see what Dixie has to say about this video. Kudos to Gregor!
Posted by: xtex88 at September 20, 2008 12:51 PM
Gregor - thanks for posting our vid... seems just like last year doesn't it xtex88... Ah youth... it's always wasted on the young...
Posted by: Dixie at September 20, 2008 01:40 PM
and DRATS Dawlin'...
Dixie finds humor in the fact that we are in on the... uh... "kill" with our friend Dexter, and that he, and we, are the only ones that know. ie... the ignorrance of others. Much like the relationship that you and I enjoy. ;x
There are, however, a few within these walls that, dare I say, have caught on quite nicely.
Oft I find myself wondering,what in the world I am doing, worrying that a serial killer might be caught... If that, in and of itself, is not funny, well I just don't know what is dearest...
Posted by: Dixie at September 20, 2008 03:00 PM
DRATS,
Hannibal Lecter is one of my all time favorite literary villians. Just great. Nice use of jocosity. Good word.
Gregor,
Thanks for the roast. Great way to end the season.
On a separate note. Why Keesha and Dan? More like Dan and Renny. If I could bottle the sexual tension between Dan and Renny I could solve the energy crisis. Me-ow.
Posted by: Tavia at September 20, 2008 03:19 PM
Great stuff can't wait for the rest of the Roast.
HD are u liking it so far?? Thanks Gregor for all the hard work putting this together for our much luved HD:)
Peace&Love Donna
Posted by: donna at September 20, 2008 05:21 PM
Dixie...LOL! Sure does:).
Posted by: xtex88 at September 20, 2008 08:25 PM
Joy in WI, Hang in there, Sweetie, and don't try any more experiments at home...OK?? We want you right here with all us other BB addicts!
Posted by: SuZieQ at September 20, 2008 08:49 PM
Tavia,
I'm quite fond of Thomas Harris' books as well, but he certainly isn't the Mozart of the literary world is he? Five books in the 33 years? (Talk about a lazy sod.)
Unfortunately, that's often the case with the scribes I prefer. Either I'm stuck with authors who leave me in a holding pattern, (waiting years on end in between their book releases) or they've long since shuffled off their mortal coil, leaving us with the pathetic offerings of their progeny. (In my never-humble opinion, Herbert and Tolkien would have done well to recommend that their sons pursue careers in food services. Because as writers, their boys would make damn good short-order cooks.)
Wouldn't it be nice if writers as prolific as Stephen King and Michael Crichton were actually consistent in the quality of their work?
Damnit, why can't everyone be like DRATS?
Speaking of good books...
I just finished reading, "LAMB ; The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal" by Christopher Moore.
If you're up for a nice leisurely read, (and you're willing to do a couple extra "Hail Marys" for some minor sacrilege) I highly recommend it.
Good reading,
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 20, 2008 09:14 PM
DRATS,
Thanks for the suggestion. Right now Im reading Devil in the White City. Not bad, But im just wasting time until Wally Lamb's new book comes out.
If you havent read it yet, The Road Cormac Macarthy. Amazing.
And Ive never have a problem with sacrilege. Regardless of my avoidance of the Hail Marys!
HD-You ok out there? You must have a lot going on there. But, look Mom! We CAN play nice together!!!! (Hmm..."Mom"... does that make the spanking thing better or worse?)
Posted by: Tavia at September 21, 2008 06:27 AM
DRATS and Tavia, appreciate naming the books you're reading..I'm always looking forward to reading something recommended/read by a compatriot..have read some of Moore's books, but not the one mentioned..Tavia, if you haven't read Isaac's Storm by Larson it's a must, especially in the wake of Ike. Will check out Lamb..Thanks, guys!!
Posted by: SuZieQ at September 21, 2008 10:59 AM
Tavia,
Play nice together? Hmm... Nah, to easy.
;)
DRATS
Posted by: Dratsab Tnagorra at September 21, 2008 03:08 PM
DRATS,
What can I say?
SuzieQ,
Thanks for the suggetion. I'll pick it up. (God, I wish I had a Kindle!!!!)
I must confess I have a horrible bout of BB withdrawl. I've been watching clips on youtube for hours. And now Weeds is over too. *sigh*
At least I have Dexter.
Posted by: Tavia at September 21, 2008 06:16 PM
Hello Drats, Gregor, Dixie, Tavia, SuzieQ, Sleepyeye, Grog, Donna, Stephie, BenF, Betty, CanFan, meemee, and everyone else that cruises this blog. Patiently awaiting roast part II. Just wanted to say hello to all and oh yeah, hello HD! Know you must be busy so take your time, but I can't wait until roast part II. Good evening all.
Posted by: xtex88 at September 21, 2008 06:48 PM
